May 2008
death talk
Dad: Do you kids remember the song I said you have to sing at my funeral?
Lacey: Yes, Dad
Dad: I think I want to be cremated and then each of you kids can have a good portion of my ashes.
Lacey: I will put my share into a Hello Kitty jar
Dad: Oh God!
Lacey: Burial is looking better everyday, huh?
Brett: Well I will etch something hilarious in his tombstone then.
Lacey: And I will come every week and put a new Hello Kitty sticker on your tombstone. See, Dad, it seems burial and cremation are now horrible options. Life looks like the better option.
Dad: Maybe you kids will die before me.
a twist on the political battle in Louisiana
The News: "...and Bobby Jindal is supporting Woody Jenkins..."
Dad: Did you hear that, honey? BJ is helping out a woody.
Me: Mom and Dad, I know what that means. You're gross!
Dad: What? I was just saying that BJ is hel...
Me: Nope, I got it. Thanks.
April 2008
Traveling meth lab closes interstate for next 2... →
…and Robbie had just asked me the other day when Crystal Meth was going to become popular in Baton Rouge. Some prayers take a while to be answered, others are answered immediately.
“Because I’m a prominent asian-american people always ask me to help them...”
– Margaret Cho
oh no
I think David Duke is on our flight.
Going to dallas for the weekend.
Jump rope
I started reading a book on fitness and discovered what a great form of exercise jump ropes are. Here are some facts from wikipedia Ten minutes of jumping rope is roughly the equivalent of running an eight-minute mile. Jumping rope can achieve a “burn rate” of up to 700 calories per hour of vigorous activity Jumping rope can avoid the knee damage which may occur during running, since...
Alena the Repeatah!
Alena: How are you?
Lacey: good I guess
Alena: Well that's good I guess
you shruted that up!
Lacey: you overslept?
Erin: totally
Erin: i hit dismiss instead of snooze on the ol' alarm
Erin: i do that about once every 3 or 4 months. so the ladies [at work] are use to it
Erin: they prob call it "pulling an Erin" when i'm not around
Complaint #200
whitewhine: Here they are, my favorite whines of the past 199 posts. I want to thank everyone who has been submitting whines and visiting the site every day. It’s really a joy to run. Now where’s my f*cking book deal? Complaint #7 “I just haven’t seen any movie worth watching since ‘The Squid and the Whale.’” - Whine by Me Complaint #50 “What the fu… Turbo...
911 oopsie
You dial 911 by mistake (9 to get out + 1 + oops). Do you: 1) Hang up. 2) Apologize. 3) Giggle like a little girl. Guess which one I did. (via yourmonkeycalled) I have actually done this before. And I hung up then giggled like a little girl.
Wikipedia entry on my high school →
I find it funny that they mention the name change of the school, however they don’t mention WHY it was changed. I went to Bishop Sullivan High School, a few years after I graduated they had to change the name of the school because apparently Bishop Sullivan had been a pedophile. He died the year I was born, so I don’t know first-hand. The wikipedia entry looks like it was entered by...
becoming a smarter me
I’ve decided to start self-educating on my lunch breaks. First subject will be geography. I need to go to the library and check out some books (and then check them out!)
always comes back to food
Me: Did you talk to Christopher? He cut my hair the other day and he said something about going to grad school in Austin and had no clue you wanted to do the same.
Robbie: I dunno about that, but he's got a huge tub of ice cream in the freezer and everyday I take a spoon and eat some. I hope he doesn't notice.
seriously?
Melissa: Do you know what MISMO is?
Lacey: What?
Melissa: MISMO?
Lacey: No.
Melissa: It stands for Mortgage Industry Standards Maintenance Organization.
Lacey: Oh.
Leigh Nash - Ocean Sized Love
WatchBrandy at her Bachelorette. I can’t watch this without laughing.
“Oh, I should have known, your gMail account is more important than your [work...”
– Boss (after I asked him to send any weekend correspondence to my gmail since I don’t check my work email at home)(also he must think gmail is an Apple product, judging by his choice of capitalization)
“If I knew falling in love was this painful, I never would’ve done it.”
– Daisy (Rock of Love finale)
Working
It’s 1:30pm on Sunday and I’m sitting at work by myself trying to get some upgrades done on the system. I can’t wait to finish up so I can lay by the pool with my roommate and freeze our butts off.
who was that guy?
Lame guy: Nice shirt, dude.
Guy with shirt: Thanks man.
Lame guy: Yeah, it's Kurt Cobain.
Guy with shirt: Yeah.
Lame guy: Died too early.
Lame guy: She did it!
Lame guy: Courtney killed him.
Jake: Yes!! I'm here for this!
WatchBabies are so dumb!
Booty Texts from an Emotional Slut →
